There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
