I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
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I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
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As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
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