he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
