he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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