He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Randomize
