Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Walk of Shame today included voting.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
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