The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
