Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
