if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Randomize
