i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
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