I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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