i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I wish you could order shots online.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Randomize
