you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
