If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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