And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
I see more hoeing in ur future
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
