Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
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