Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
