i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
