the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
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