Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves