Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
