He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
