I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
