You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I love you. Go after that dick
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
