This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
