god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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