My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
tell me about the fingering
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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