Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Randomize
