Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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