I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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