I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
