i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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