You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
