Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
