you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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