hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
