I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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