I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
