By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
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