Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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