ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Randomize
