I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
