How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
she told me i tasted like america
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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