the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
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