we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Houston, we have a squirter
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
