Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
