if i can run in heels then i can drive
Me too!
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
