Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
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Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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