Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
