Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
