I don't remember. Are we still dating?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
