I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
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